Life's too short
by BL-is-love
Summary: Life’s too short. What happens when you realize that everyone else got everything you ever wanted, and you were left alone and dealing with losing everything that was ever yours and everything you always wanted to be yours? Brooke-centric
1. Chapter 1

Brooke-centric one shot

**Brooke-centric one shot. It's really short, takes place after 6x03 and I really hope you guys will like it.**

**Description: Life's too short. What happens when you realize that everyone else got everything you ever wanted, and you were left alone, suffering and dealing with losing everything that was ever yours and everything you always wanted to be yours?**

Life's too short. Too short to wake up with regrets and too short for feeling the way she feels right now – alone, depressed, angry. And how should she feel?

She never thought her mom would fall that low and steal her designs, just because she wants her company. When she got a chance to spend time with her mom again, she believed things could change. Or, maybe she just wanted them to change, you know, to have a mom finally. She wanted her mom's love and a part of her believed and hoped she finally got it, they were running Clothes Over Bros together and things finally seemed to look family-like. But, that's where she was wrong. Victoria Davis wasn't a person and a mother whose love for her own child can be unconditional. Victoria Davis loved money and power. And that was all she really wanted and she knew how to get it – used Brooke's talent and youth and good looks and made right business decisions. Brooke fooled herself for years that she couldn't be without Victoria because that's how Victoria made her feel about it. When she finally tried Victoria found a way to take that away from her too. How would you feel if your mother took away the one thing you really considered yours? The one thing you wished for and the one thing you really worked on? Disappointed. As if you can't even do that one thing right.

Life's too short. And Victoria Davis took her company away from her.

Nathan came by a few weeks ago to remind her that him and Haley are there for her, for whatever she needs. He also reminded her how alike their roads have been. She chuckled at it, because a part of it was right, they had bad parents, belonged to the same clicks and they both grew up being the worst versions of themselves and later on they both lost their dreams, Nate's basketball career was taken away from him the same way Brooke's company was taken away by Victoria. But, a part of her didn't really understand how did Nate dare to compare the two of them. After all, Nate had someone who made him a better person, someone he could wake up next to and be happy. Nate had an amazing kid who had an enormous heart, just like his mom and dad. Nate had a family, and she had no one. Nathan had Haley, the amazing and unique Haley, the person who makes everyone around better people and helps everyone through their own set of problems, that same Haley that made Nate the person he is today just by giving her all her heart, unconditionally. And the two of them did give her hope, hope that her life can be better, the hope that someday she will find someone who will love her as much as they love each other. But love didn't find her. Nathan also had Jamie, the little kid that melts everyone's hearts, the kid that sometimes makes Brooke feel as if she was the one who's immature, the person who has a pure heart and a strong will. Jamie was only 5, and yet he had the mind and the heart of someone much, much older than that. Jamie was stronger than anyone of them when Quentin died, maybe because he didn't really understand, but he knew his friend was gone forever. Jamie was a combination of all the best his parents had, and that was by itself a lot.

Life's too short. And Nathan had the kind of family she always wanted.

There's another thing she wanted – a child. She wanted to be a mom her mother never was and she wanted to give all her love to a little creature out there that was left without it. She was so sure it was the right thing to do. But, again, Victoria Davis took it away from her by telling the social worker Brooke's not ready to be a mom. So, she couldn't even adopt a kid. And she was really ready for it. She was ready to bathe it, she was ready to change the little one's diapers, she was ready to sing lullabies until it falls asleep, she was ready to tuck it in, send it to school and a good college someday. She was ready to help the kid become the best person it can be, much better than the person she became when she was being raised by her parents. But no, she didn't have a Lucas or an Owen or a Chase and that's what they wanted her to have. She couldn't be a mother because she didn't have a father to offer. And than she got Angie, the sweetest baby in the world who needed help. She spent a month with Angie, taking care of her, and she really liked the idea of being a mom to her. But, then the day came when she had to give it back to her parents, and it broke her heart a little. When she gave Angie back she felt so much love for their kid and she hated herself for being so jealous of her parents. Those people went through so much with their baby having a surgery away from them, feared for her life but yet, Brooke was jealous simply because they had a kid, and an amazing one, to be afraid for and to pray for.

Life's too short. Some people out there had the baby Brooke wanted. Not Angie, but any other baby who needs a family.

And why would she even need an Owen? Why would she want a guy who would convince her he's different and better and more right for her just to disappear at the mention of the word "baby"? It's not as if she wanted his child, or even asked him to help her adopt. She took a baby who needed surgery in order to live a full life, she wanted to help the little one for whole two months, maybe even less and he panicked? Hung up on her and never called again? What kind of heart does that man have? And there was Chase, who was really sweet and even offered to help but a part of her couldn't say yes to that because she would feel as if she was betraying herself and using him. She knew that Chase did want to help and even become a big part of her life but she couldn't let him be there. He was her ex boyfriend and Owen's friend, but most of all it was because she didn't really love him. Not even in high school. She did like him and loved spending time with him and he did make her feel happy, but he wasn't the one for her, he was a little too much for her… a little too _there. _He was an easy way out, there was nothing wrong with him but he simply wasn't the one. Sort of like Lindsay was for Lucas, though their relationship went further than hers with Chase ever will. Lucas… Who was Lucas for her? A good friend? An ex boyfriend? Her best friends fiancée? The only man she ever loved? Or even all of that. He was her ex boyfriend who became a good friend as the years went by but always stayed the love of her life and was now engaged to her best friend. Fair? She didn't think so. But she knew it was right. After all, Lucas was always in love with Peyton. He even wrote it himself in a book she read over and over again a million times, the one she knows by heart especially that part about Peyton being the one he had always loved, the part about his moment of clarity, a part that made her and their relationship seem as so much less than it ever represented to her. So, she just stayed a friend, something she always should've been instead of being a bump on the road for Lucas and Peyton and their epic love. She was hotter, more popular and now richer than her, yet Peyton Sawyer got the guy, the guy they both loved. She will never tell Peyton that she never got over Lucas, no way, that's something she would never do to her friend because that would make her the same as Peyton, and she didn't want that. She will never tell Lucas either that she never got over him, and she will never tell him how she shivered every time he would hold her in his arms and how good it felt to play house with him and Angie. The blond boy with piercing blue eyes was the same thing that Haley was for Nathan – the one who helped her become a better person and the one who was there for her. Even though he never really was hers.

Life's too short. And Peyton Sawyer had the man Brooke always wanted.

Life's too short. And maybe she wanted it to be even shorter. Maybe she just wanted to take the pain away. That's how she felt now, standing in front of her bathroom mirror. She stared at her reflection in it, bruised face and neck and arms, pale cheeks and swollen eyes. She just wanted to take the pain away. With a hand full of pain killers she tried her best not to cry. She didn't write a goodbye note, she didn't explain a thing. It would only cause more drama. And even now, she wore a brave face even though she was afraid of what's to come. She necked the pain killers all at once, too many of them, but the pain was still there. At least for a few more seconds. And then she fell to the floor and her heart started beating slower. The last thing she heard was a voice that belonged to a man that was calling out her name. And than she stopped breathing. Life's too short. But, the pain lasted way too long for her to handle. It was that sharp, naked, unbearable pain. Life's too short.

**Loved it? Or hated it? Let me know. Also, let me know if you would like me to write a sequel that would be a few chapters long, maybe Brooke can survive this. Or maybe she won't and they'd all have to deal with it. Let me know in your review!**


	2. Author's Note

Okay, so it took me forever to go back to this and think about it. I REALLY wanna continue writing this, I even have a pretty good idea where to take it. So I just wanna remind the people who added it to the alert list that this story will be continued for a few more chapters, so you will get to see the aftermath. Also, whoever found this now, go back and read the first chapter, and let me know what do you think about it, it means the world to me. And a big fat **thank you **to the people who reviewed this, it means a lot to me!! Thanks a LOT! So guys, prepared to see what's next to come in a few days most probably.

Again, I'm sorry it took me this long. Hope you're gonna enjoy it!


	3. Hear You Me

**Hey people! Thanks for the reviews and thanks for sticking with this story even though it was originally supposed to be a one-shot. Anyways, PLEASE when u add a story to the story alert list, make sure you review it as well, because every opinion and ideas mean a lot to me. Thanks again for reading, and I hope you'll enjoy this chapter. Done with rambling. ENJOY!**

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_There's no one in town I know  
You gave us some place to go  
I never said thank you for that  
'thought I might get one more chance_

The cemetary in Tree Hill was packed with people. Everyone came to say goodbye to the famous fashion designer. Peyton and Haley tried to convince Victoria that it's a bad idea to have a public funeral, but the only thing Victoria wanted was publicity, even on the funeral of her own daughter. There weren't too many people there, but a few celebrity faces and photographers were spotted. Today, the world was saying goodbye to Brooke Penelope Davis. The expression of everyone's faces was the same – blank and empty. Most of them were still in shock and disbelief of what had happened just one day before. In the eyes of some of them Brooke Davis had everything – money, popularity, fame, beauty. Not many knew of all the cracks in her heart. Not many knew what kind of parents she had, the wants and desires she didn't know how to make come true, the love she gave up on and the life she thought she wouldn't need when she was still a young girl of 16. In the front row, closest to the coffen stand Haley and Nathan with Jamie between them, and Peyton and Lucas with their arms interlaced. Haley's eyes are swollen from all the crying and it's notable even though she wears dark glasses.

_What would you think of me now?  
So lucky, so strong, so proud  
I never said thank you for that  
Now I'll never have a chance_

_**[Haley – voiceover] Today I'm saying goodbye to my best friend. I'm saying goodbye to the girl who reached a hand for me when I thought nobody would. **_

'_You can move in with me if you want.'_

_**I'm saying goodbye to the person with the biggest heart in the world. I still can't let go of her, I still can't believe she's gone. Yesterday my whole life turned upside down.**_

'_Haley I...' Nathan spoke through tears _

'_What's wrong, Nate? Where are you?' Haley panicked on the phone just by hearing the sound of his voice, he sounded upset and he was crying, not something Nathan would do for no reason._

'_I'm... I'm at Brooke's, Haley. I found her... in the bathroom. She's... she's gone, Hales... she killed herself.' As soon as Nathan finished his sentence Haley's phone hit the ground. Her face changed immediatly and tears were streaming down her face, and she didn't even try to control them. She fall in the floor and covered her face with her hands. _

'_**I still don't understand why, Brooke. Why did you do it? What happened that was so bad that you couldn't even tell me? God damn it, why didn't you tell me, Brooke? I told you I'm here for you, for whatever it is. Damn it, Brooke, we were friends. And you just decided to leave me? To leave all of us? That's not fair, Brooke, it's not. Today you broke my heart into million little pieces. What am I gonna tell people about you when they start asking questions? Brooke Davis was my friend. Brooke Davis was my maid of honor. Brooke Davis was my son's godmother. Brooke Davis was the best person I ever met. Brooke Davis had a heart as big as the ocean, but she had a hard time letting others see it. Brooke Davis killed herself, and I don't know why, or how. She didn't talk to my about anything that was troubling her. She didn't even leave a goodbye note. Brooke Davis is now gone. And I don't know how to handle it.'**_

Right next to Haley, between her and Nathan stood Jamie. He was looking to the ground and was still wearing his red cape.

_May angels lead you in  
Hear you me my friends  
On sleepless roads, the sleepless go  
May angels lead you in_

_**[Jamie – voiceover] 'What is death? Where do people go when they die? A few days ago Q died, and now my aunt Brooke is gone too. Why is everyone leaving? Mom says heaven is a great place and that they're better off there, but if that's true then why is she crying all day long? I don't believe her. I told her I wanna go with my aunt Brooke and she started yelling and hugging me at the same time and that's when I realized Tree Hill is a much better place than heaven. Dad told me heaven is the place where the good people go after they die, so I know Brooke is there for sure. She was the best godmother in the world. She was my friend, a better friend than Chester was. I'm gonna miss Brooke but I'll do my best to be a good person too, so I can see her in heaven someday.'**_

Nathan's eyes were filled with tears, even though he was trying his best to hold them inside, he tried to be strong for his family. But, the day before showed no mercy towards him. Another amazing person was dead, and she practically died in his arms.

'_Brooke! Brooke!' Nathan was calling out her name after he knocked on the front door a few times but no one answered, yet the door was unlocked. He entered the house and called out for Brooke but there was no response there. He heard a noise in the bathroom and ran there as fast as possible. The only thing he saw when he opened the door was Brooke on the ground and an empty bottle of painkillers. He squatted down next to her and held her in his arms. There was no pulse, and he immediatly called 911. By the time they got there he tried splashing her with water, gently hitting her in the face and shaking her whole body – nothing worked. The ambulance came a few minutes later and there was only one thing they could do – inform him that she's dead and that there's nothing they can do for her anymore.'_

_So what would you think of me now?  
So lucky, so strong, so proud  
I never said thank you for that  
Now I'll never have a chance_

May angels lead you in  
Hear you me my friends  
On sleepless roads the sleepless go  
May angels lead you in

'_**Brooke Davis was a fighter. She was the person who knew exactly what I went through in high school. Brooke Davis was the most selfless person in the world. She cared about people too much. I'm still trying to put all the pieces of the puzzle together and see why she too away her own life – Brooke Davis, the most cherry person I ever met, the most optimistic person in the world. What can go wrong so badly that can make her do this to herself? She didn't talk about it with Haley nor Peyton. Luke told me she didn't talk to him either. And I keep thinking about it, over and over again, and I just ask myself – why? Why did this have to happen to her, out of all the people in the world? Brooke was the person who helped me get together with Haley in the first place. She was the person who even tried to convince me to get back together with her after the summer I spent in High Flyers. She was there for me when Haley left for the tour, ordering pizza and looking after me with Lucas. I will never forget Brooke Davis, and I will never forget what she did for me. She made me, and everyone else, a better person, just by being a part of our lives. Thank you, Brooke, for everything. We already miss you.'**_

It wasn't easy finding the right words to describe Brooke Davis, for she was the most complex person you could ever get a chance to meet. She was cherry, bubbly and overall a person who could make your day amazing just by smiling. She was also the person who hid amazingly behind that mask of a happy and satisfied 22 year old designer who's thrilled with what life gave her. She was also the girl who got everything she ever wished for – and then realized it wasn't enough. Realized it wasn't what she really needed. While she was caught up in her success she simply forgot what's it like to just be young, act young, feel young.

_(May angels lead you in)  
May angels lead you in  
(May angels lead you in)  
May angels lead you in_

And if you were with me tonight  
I'd sing to you just one more time  
A song for a heart so big  
God wouldn't let it live

'_**She was fiercly independent. Brooke Davis. Brilliant and beautiful and brave. Even today I can still say the exact same words for her because that's who she was. I said once that she was gonna change the world someday, and I meant it. Brooke changed the world of all of us who were lucky enough for her to let us into her world. Brooke Davis was willing to help anyone. Brooke made everyone around her a better person. And I've been kicking myself for not helping her overcome this, for not being there for her, for not seeing how broken she actually was. Today I lost a great friend. Today I lost the girl who was my first true love. Today, I feel like a part of me went away with her. I will always remember Brooke Davis, and cherish every moment I got to spend with her. Those who know her know how amazing she was. Those who don't can only be sorry they never got a chance to meet her. I just... I wish I at least had an oportunity to say goodbye. To tell her how much I love her and that I'm gonna miss her, you know? Just to say goodbye.'**_

'_I just wish you could rescue me' Brooke spoke in a pleading voice_

'_From what?' he replied, caressing her hand._

'_From all of it.' She replied and he slowly nodded._

'_I will... only if you promise to rescue me back'_

_May angels lead you in  
Hear you me my friends  
On sleepless roads the sleepless go  
May angels lead you in_

May angels lead you in  
Hear you me my friends  
On sleepless roads the sleepless go  
May angels lead you in

'_**Saying goodbye. I somehow got used to it, I started expecting it. My first mom died when I was 10, my biological mom died as soon as I got a chance to really meet her. And now I have to say goodbye to the person who stood by me through all of it – my best friend, my sister, my Brooke. Brooke, I'm not here to judge you or hold any grudges for leaving all of us. I just wish you told me what was going on. You were my Brooke, and you always will be. I know we had our ups and downs, we had good and bad moments, but through it all, no matter in what kind of fight we got in, we would end up stronger than ever because no matter what we always loved and cared about each other more than anything. I love you, Brooke. And I always will. I miss you, and I'll miss you every day until I die. Goodbye, Brooke.'**_

He woke up when he heard the doors behind him close.

'How is she?' he heard his brother ask him. He looked to the face of the person who was lying in the hospital bed. For a second he was confused and then realized – it was all a dream. Brooke was still alive and with them... at least for now.

'I don't know man, the doctors haven't told me anything. Haley went to ask them just now.' Nathan replied.

'So, what happened really?' Lucas asked his brother and took a seat on the chair next to him. They both looked at Brooke and Nathan started, not moving his eyes from Brooke. 'Well, long story short, I went to see her a few hours ago and the front door was opened. I called her name and she wasn't answering and then I found her on the bathroom floor with an empty bottle of painkillers. I called 911 right away, and they asked me do I have any idea how much she took but I didn't know. We drove here very fast and they went to pump the painkillers out of her. They managed to save her for now, but they still don't know if she's gonna make it.' Nathan tried to explain in the best possible way, even though half of the things is one big blur to him, but he guessed that's how the things went.

'God... I... I keep thinking about every time I saw her in the last few weeks, and I tried to remember every single thing she said, trying to find something that would point to this, something I should've seen a while ago and helped her.' Lucas held his head in his hands and looked straight to the floor, he didn't have the power to look at Brooke.

'I think we're all doing the same thing right now, Luke. Trying to see what we missed.'

'Was there some sort of goodbye note?' Luke asked, hoping she left the answers so they don't have to torture themselves.

'No, nothing. At least not in the bathroom.' Nate replied. Lucas nodded his head and the two of them stayed by Brooke's side, none of them saying a word.

**Well, that's it, folks! At least for now. I really hope you made it all the way to the end of the chapter and didn't give up at the idea of Brooke being dead. Did you really think I could kill off my fav character? Well, not for now. Please REVIEW, it means everything to me.**


	4. Wasteland

**First, I just wanna thank everyone for the reviews for the last chapter. Wish there were more, cause I'm beginning to doubt this story. So please, if you like it and story alert it, then please review too, each and every opinion means the world to me. Thanks again to those who did! Anyways, here's the next chapter...**

Haley was sitting in the waiting room, alone. The expression on her face was blank and empty, she was staring at the wall across her chair, yet she wouldn't even see an elephant if it walked by.

'You okay?' Peyton asked as she approached her caring two cups of coffee. Haley turned to look at her.

'Yea, I guess I'm as okay as I can be... as we all can.' She answered and half smiled. Peyton nodded simply and handed her the coffee before taking a seat next to her.

'Haley, I gotta ask you something. Did Brooke tell you anything about her bruises?'

Haley moved in her seat a bit. 'No, she didn't. And I didn't even ask her, with Quentin's funeral and everything I just thought it... I don't know, I guess I just thought she would come to me and talk if it was something important, you know? Why?'

'Because... she told me she fell of the stairs.' Peyton replied and looked Haley in the eye. Haley let out a small chuckle.

'And you believed her? Peyton, did you see her eyes? Stairs don't do that to people.'

'I... I don't know, I guess I just never thought she would lie to me about it, especially if... God, I don't even wanna think about it.' Peyton said as she held her head in her arms.

'You better start.' They both heard a voice behind them and turned around to see the person who just entered the waiting room.

'What?' they both said at the same time, taken back by the words. 'That what you think happened... did happen. Brooke was robbed in her store but she was also beaten up, badly. I'm sorry I'm the one to tell you both, and not Brooke, but she asked me to not say a word. I just thought now wasn't the time to shut up.' Deb spoke as she took a seat across from Peyton and Haley. Haley started crying and covered her mouth with her hand.

'How did you know?' Peyton asked as calmly as possible before standing up and pacing through the hallway while Deb was explaining. 'She called me the next morning, told me what happened and asked me to teach her how to shoot from a gun. She also asked me not to tell any of you, she didn't wanna upset anyone or make you worry about her, especially with your engagement.'

'God, how could I be so stupid!' Peyton threw her arms in the air, not knowing what to do.

'I... did he... you know?' Haley asked, unable to say the words, afraid to think it.

'I don't know, Haley. I didn't ask her, I figured she would tell me if she felt it was something to say. So, as far as I know, no he didn't rape her... but who knows?' Deb replied as Peyton squatted down.

'At least now all of this makes some sense. God, Brooke!' Peyton spoke as tears started sliding down her face. In that moment Nathan appeared.

'What's going on?' he asked, scared after seeing both Peyton and Haley crying. 'Hey, Brooke's alive and okay for now. Why are you two crying?' He asked as he took a seat next to Haley and placed his hand on her back.

'No, Nathan, she's just alive. But, she's definitely not okay.' Haley simply replied as she wiped away her tears.

'Mom, what are you doing here?'

'I came as soon as I found out about Brooke cause there was something you guys needed to know.'

'Nate, where's Lucas?' Peyton asked when she finally managed to calm down and take a seat.

'He stayed with Brooke, he didn't want to leave her alone in case she wakes up and I really needed to get out of there.' Nate replied and Peyton just simply nodded. It wasn't an every day situation for any of them, since Brooke was always the strongest one out of them all. 'Will you now tell me that thing we should know, mom?' Nate asked and Deb just nodded. It's gonna be a long night, and they all knew it.

-----

Lucas was half asleep on a chair in Brooke's room when a voice pulled him back to reality.

'How're you holding up?' he heard Peyton say silently, as if she was afraid of breaking the perfect silence in the room.

Lucas rubbed his face with his hands and looked at Brooke and than turned to Peyton 'I'm okay, I'm just really worried about her.' He replied softly. Peyton nodded her head. 'Yeah.' She said as she found a way to the chair next to Lucas. 'Listen, Luke. There's something you should know.' Peyton spoke slowly, and Lucas knew what she had to say weren't good news. He gave her a look that urged her to speak up.

Peyton took a deep breath before starting the story 'The bruises on Brooke's arms, legs and eyes are... a few days ago... she...' Peyton couldn't find the words to say what she had to say. The words were on her mind yet it was so hard to speak up and let them out. 'Luke, she's been robbed and beaten up.' She rambled a bit, but Lucas heard her very well. He jumped from his chair. 'What? When? How? Do you know who did it?' he asked lots of questions, yet Peyton understood his worry so she told Lucas the whole story. 'She doesn't know who did it, it happened when we were in Vegas, or LA, I'm not sure, and it all happened at the store. The only person she opened up to was, surprisingly, Deb.' Peyton finished and Lucas gave her a confused look. 'Deb?' he asked, as if he was checking if he understood right. Peyton nodded. 'Why Deb? I mean, with all the friends she has she went to an ex-addict who's dating Skills?' Both of them let out a small laughter. 'I guess she went to Deb because she knew Deb owns a gun and she wanted to learn to shoot, so she could defend herself. I think she really got scared. I mean, that's what Deb told me, that they've been going shooting.' Lucas looked at Peyton for a few seconds, and then turned to Brooke. 'Or she went to Deb because she doesn't feel like she can tell anyone of us. I... I feel like such a bad friend, you know? Like, while she was here going through so much crap you and me were about to get married. I... I promised her... God, when did we beome so selfcentered?' he spoke with his head in his arms. Peyton looked to the floor not able to say anything. 'Luke, no one's to blame for it. I mean, yeah, we missed that something's going on with her, but she didn't open up to us.' Luke shoke his head 'That's the thing, Peyton. Brooke never opens up if you don't make her do it, she's so closed that she always feels like she's bothering everyone with her problems. I think she just needed someone to see through her mask. It's the way she is, Peyton. She's always there for all of us, but when she needs support she never asks for it, she pushes us away and makes us believe she's okay, when in reality she's more fragile than we all see.' Peyton looked at him and a tear rolled down her face. 'I just... I just want her to wake up so I can have my best friend back, and take care of her, and show her how much I love her.' Peyton was sobbing now, and Lucas hugged her. 'Sshh, don't worry, she'll wake up. She'll be fine, she'll be our Brooke again.' Luke spoke and kissed Peyton's forehead.

-----

Nathan and Haley were sitting at the waiting room, waiting for Brooke's doctor to come and tell them how is she, and when she will wake up. They saw Dr. Stevens approaching them, and they both stood up, nervous and scared.

'Hello, Mr. Scott.' The doctor said.

'Dr. Stevens.' Nathan replied and nodded. 'This is my wife, Haley Scott. We're Brooke's best friends.' He explained.

'How is she?' Haley asked, not being able to wait any longer to find out what's Brooke's condition.

'She's okay, she's getting better. She took a large amount of painkillers and she mixed them with alcohol, but luckily, Mr. Scott found her on time. If you get there 15 minutes later there would be nothing we could do. This way, we managed to get everything out of her in time and by tomorrow she'll wake up and feel better. I'm thinking of sending her to therapy, since she obviously tried to kill herself. She needs to talk to a psychiatrist. I'll discuss that with her once she wakes up and feels a bit better. For now, she needs to stay here until she gets completely better, and has at least 3 meetings with our psychiatrist, we need to make sure she won't try to do the same thing again. Just... when she gets out of here, I need you both to pay attention on her attitude and the way she acts, take care of her and make sure she doesn't miss her meetings with the psychiatrist. And talk to her as much as you can, and spend time with her.'

'Okay. Thank you, doctor. Just tell me when can we take her home?' Nathan asked.

'In a few days, hopefully. We'll talk about it when she wakes up. Excuse me now, I have to check on the patients.' Doctor said and left the couple alone.

'Nate, you think she'll talk to us once she wakes up?'

Nathan wrapped his arm around Haley's shoulders. 'I don't know, Hales. I sure hope so.'

'What's going on guys? I saw the doctor talking to you.' Peyton spoke behind them. 'Is everything okay?'

'Yeah, Peyt, it's fine so far. Brooke's getting better and the doctor hopes she'll wake up tonight or tomorrow, and than she'll have to talk to a specialist and in a few days we can take her home. I'm not sure where should we take her. I mean, I'd love to have her stay at our place, but knowing Brooke she'll tell us to stop treating her like an idiot and to take her to her home, but I'm just really scared of leaving her all alone there.' Nathan explained

'You're scared she might try to do it again?' Peyton asked

'Yeah, that too. But most of all I'm just scared that she will feel alone and lonely again.' Nate replied and looked at both girls.

'We'll discuss it when she wakes up. Maybe we'll just spend a lot of time at her place, make her feel wanted and loved.' Haley tried to think, be resonable, but most of all she was just scared, and unsure what would be the right thing to do.

'Or maybe she'll agree on moving in with me and Lucas.' Peyton suggested. Nathan and Haley shared a glance, both of them wondering if that's a good idea. 'Speaking of, where is Lucas?' Haley asked, trying to change the subject slightly. 'Is he still with Brooke?'

'Yeah, he doesn't want to leave her alone. He feels guily for what happened, and I didn't manage to make him realize it's no one's fault.' Peyton answered and looked to the floor.

'I'll talk to him.' Haley said and gave Nathan a small peck on the lips before heading to Brooke's room.

-------

'Hey, best friend.' Haley said as soon as she entered. Lucas smiled.

'Hey, you. Did you talk to the doctor?'

'She's getting better, Luke. She'll wake up today or tomorrow, at least that's what the doctor hopes will happen. She took a lot of painkillers and alcohol.' Haley explained and took a seat on a chair.

'I really hope she wakes up soon. I wanna talk to her, see what happened that caused her to do what she did.' Lucas answered. 'I just really need to see her open her eyes again, and hear her laugh, and just talk to her about anything. Do you think it's our fault?' he asked Haley and looked her in the eyes. She looked away. 'I don't know, Luke. Maybe. We were all so busy with our own lives we didn't realize something went wrong in hers. I feel like I betrayed her in some ways. Like I focused on Jamie, and Nathan and you and Peyton that I never asked her how she's doing, just check on her, you know?' Haley replied and looked to the floor. 'Yeah, I know exactly how you feel.' Luke replied and chuckled. 'And all this time she was the one to support all of us. Be there for all of us, with whatever we needed. I told her before I went to Vegas with Peyton that she saves people. I just think she needed to be saved once and no one was there.'

'Peyton tells me you're feeling guilty for what happened to Brooke, but Luke, you shouldn't. In a way, we're all to blame, but at the same time, it really is no one's fault.'

'The thing is... I promised her, Hales. I promised and I didn't keep my promise.'

Haley gave him a weird, confused look. 'What are you talking about?'

'Back in high school, senior year, when Brooke and I were together... after the school shooting, when Keith died... you remember how she threw a party, only to help everyone, but most of all me, heal?' Haley nodded. 'Well, I in a way pushed her away from me. And after the party I found her in my room, lying on the bed. She seemed so sad, so broken. Anyways, she told me she watched me save Peyton and that she just wishes that for once I would rescue her. I asked from what, and she said all of it. I promised to save her if she saves me back. And I never did it. I never saved her. And she needed me to do it now, and I wasn't there. I was with Peyton again. Don't get me wrong, I love Peyton, it's just that... it feels like I'm saving her all the time, but... when I'm with Peyton it's like the world doesn't exist... in a bad way. It's like I do my best to save Peyton, to be with Peyton, and I stop paying attention to everyone else. That's what happened again, now. I saw Brooke's face, the bruises, and I never once asked her what's wrong, and if she's okay. I never saved her.' He finished and looked at Haley. They both said nothing for the next few seconds and Haley put her arm on his shoulder.

'Don't worry, superhero, you'll get your chance. She'll need more saving now than she ever has.' Both of them chuckled and looked at Brooke. 'She looks so vulnerable.' Haley said. 'So peaceful, yet vulnerable.' Lucas chuckles. 'Doesn't she always?' he smiles and removes a strand of hair from Brooke's face. 'I should go, get some coffee. Would you mind staying with her in the meanwhile?'

'Of course, Luke, I would love to. You go, get coffee, talk to Peyton a bit, she must be feeling awful and I'll be with Brooke. It's my turn now.' Lucas kissed Haley's forehead and wrapped his arms around her into a hug. 'Maybe this will get us all as close as we used to be before.' He said and left the room.

-------

It's been a few hours since Lucas left Brooke's room. Haley set there alone, and than Nathan came to keep her company but only for a little while cause he needed to go home and check on Jamie, and talk to his mom again, see if there's something she forgot to tell them about Brooke and the robbery. Haley was laying down a bit, she placed her head on Brooke's bed, trying to somehow relax and get some rest. She was almost asleep when she heard a voice say her name. She lifted her head right away and looked at Brooke. She was finally awake. 'Brooke!' Haley almost screamed out. 'How are you? Do you want me to call the doctor?' she panicked a bit, yet she was happy to see her friend awake.

'Where am I?' Brooke asked. 'You're at a hospital, Brooke.' Haley simply replied, not knowing what to say really, how to start the whole topic about Brooke's suicide attempt.

'So, you all know what happened?' Brooke asked, ashamed. Haley nodded. 'Nate found you. Brooke, why...' Haley didn't even finish the sentence, it was still so hard to her to say the word suicide out loud. 'I just needed the pain to go away.' Brooke replied and Haley nodded. She knew Brooke won't say much right away and she also knew Brooke didn't like pressure. So she decided to wait with questions, she decided to let Brooke rest a bit. 'I'll call the doctor, okay?' Brooke nodded. 'It's really good to see you awake, Brooke. And we have a lot of talking to do.' Haley said before leaving the room. Brooke smiled. She knew that now it won't be easy for her to get away from what happened and how she feels. She knew her friends will ask many questions. Most of which she doesn't really have an answer to. And even if she does, she's not sure if she wants and dares to say them out loud. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, trying to take in the fact that instead of being in heaven, she's in a hospital, and that instead of being dead, she's alive. Instead of being away from the pain, she feels it even stronger than before. When she opens her eyes again, the doctor is entering her room.

'Hello Miss. Davis. I'm doctor Stevens. It's nice to see you awake. We'll have to run some tests, to make sure everything's okay with you and first thing tomorrow morning you will have to talk to our psychiatrist.'

'I'm not crazy.' Brooke answered to that, and the doctor smiled. 'I know you're not. But, you're in a lot of pain. You need to talk to her.' The doctor replied and Brooke nodded, after all he was right, she was in a lot of pain. Your friends were really worried about you. Don't shut them out.' He said and she just smiled again. 'I'll go order some tests, and I'll talk to you later. Do you want me to tell someone to come here, they're all in the waiting room?' Doctor asked. 'Yeah, please do. Anyone of them can come, I don't mind, I just want someone to keep me company.' She answered and the doctor nodded. 'You just make sure you rest a lot.' The doctor said and left her room.

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**That's it for now! It's a slow chapter, but it was meant to be a filler in a way. Now that Brooke's awake, the action will really start! But, before that: loved it or hated it? Make sure you rate and comment, leave a suggestion of you have one and I'll try and write the next chapter as soon as possible, but it could take a while, with my finals coming up! **


	5. Shattered

**UGH! One more time I need to apologize cause it took me so long to write this chapter, and it's not even that long. I know I suck at keeping this updated, but I will try my best for it to change now, and I'll try to update more often from now on. Anyways, thanks a lot for all the reviews I got for the previous chapter, you guys made my day! Make sure you review this one as well!**

Brooke was alone in her room for a minute or two now. She felt tired and she didn't even know what time was it, or which day. But most of all, she didn't know what would she tell her friends once she faces them. How would she explain what happened? She wondered if they already found out about the attack. She tried to remember what exactly went wrong with her suicide attempt and how come she was in a hospital, and not dead.

'Brooke.' She heard a voice that belonged to the person who just walked through the door and that was when she finally remembered.

'You.' She replied and chuckled. Nathan looked at her from the door and than walked fastly to the bed and pulled her in his arms. She rested her head on his shoulder and held onto his grasp for a minute or two. 'Thank you.' She said, not completely sure why. They pulled out of the hug and he looked into her eyes. He didn't know what to say, what to ask and what to avoid saying.

'It was you, right?' she asked and he nodded. He knew what she meant by it. 'I've been trying to remember how I got here and when you called my name I remembered I've heard your voice... you know.' She replied. She wasn' able to finish the sentence, she didn't even know how to finish it. 'Nate, I remember hearing your voice right after I tried to kill myself' was still a hard thing to pronaunce out loud, even though she was aware of the fact she will have to talk about it sooner or later. Later just seemed like a really good idea for now.

'Yeah, it was me.' Nate replied 'Brooke, I don't wanna put any pressure on you, especially not right now, but... this IS a big deal. We need to talk. We all wanna help, just tell us what to do.' He said, not sure if those were the right words to use. Brooke nodded. 'Nate, listen, I really _really _don't want to talk about any of it. I did what I did because I wanted to do it. I maybe even regret it already but it doesn't change what I already did, or at least tried to do. The fact that I'm alive changes nothing.' She answered, and he was taken aback by her words. She sounded cruel. As if she really didn't care about her own life. As if nothing really mattered to her anymore. As if her soul was empty.

'Brooke...' he didn't even know what to say. 'Don't say that. Everything can change. Nothing is impossible. Just open up, talk to us. We're all here for you.' He tried to comfort her and he reached for her hand. She pulled away while chuckling. 'Nate, don't okay? I don't need your sympathy and I don't need anyone telling me how amazing I am or that I'm a great friend, or that I have everything or that there're many people who care about me. I don't care, okay? I don't care! Because you know what? People who care actually try and people who care are there for you to make sure you _don't _try to kill yourself, and not after it.' She was talking surprisingly callm, maybe it was because of the meds or maybe it was simply because she was indifferent.

'Listen, Brooke, I am your friend. I tried to talk to you, yet you stayed quiet. You told me nothing. And if people tell you you're beautiful and amazing and that they care, didn't it occur to you that they actually think and feel that way?' He stood up from her bed and was now standing by the door. 'I was never more scared in my entire life than when I found you lying there. I was scared because I was looking at one of my closest friends almost dead. I was crying in this very room. I was worried sick. And Brooke, that's only because I _do _care and because I _do _think you're amazing. But, if you don't see it, if you don't see how much I care about you, then Brooke you better think twice.' He said in an almost yelling voice and left the room, slamming the door. Brooke never once looked away from him. Even when he went out she kept looking at the door. She knew he had a point, and she knew he was honest, she saw it in his eyes. She wanted to apologies for what she previously said, and she wanted to apologies for what she put him through but she couldn't anymore, cause he was already gone. She made a mental note to do it the next time she sees him. She finally looked away from the door and looked around the room. There was nothing there – no fruits, water, magazines or just anything really – and that was a sign for her that she wasn't in there for a long time, maybe a day or so. She tried to work through the rest of the memories, yet they were unsorted. The last thing she remembers was taking the pills and fainting. Nothing more. She stayed alone for a few more minutes, and than someone knocked the door. 'Come in!' she half-yelled and the doors opened.

'Hey' Peyton said as she entered the room and found her way to the chair next to the bed.

'Hey' Brooke replied simply, afraid of what's to come. 'Brooke, I don't want to push you to speak, or make you open up to me right this instant. I don't understand why didn't you talk to anyone of us, and I know you didn't fall down the stairs.'

'Peyton, I –' Brooke tried to speak but Peyton cut her off. 'No, Brooke, let me finish. I don't understand and I won't until you let me in.'

'_And why won't you ever just let me all the way in? She begged Lucas while hitting him in the chest._

Brooke tried to shake off the memory of that fight with Lucas, but it was almost impossible to do so.

'And Brooke, I am here for you. For whatever you need. If it's talking and listening or if it's just shopping and shaking this off, I'm here. Okay?' Peyton said. Brooke was grateful for Peyton's words, grateful she didn't push her and she knew Peyton would stand behind her words, at least for the time being.

'Thanks.' She said simply, unsure if Peyton would really be here if she knew a part of what Brooke did was Peyton's future husband, Brooke's ex boyfriend.

'So, listen, we were all wondering if you'd like to move in with someone? Me and Luke would love to have you, and so would Naley.'

'I don't need anyone to babysit me. I'll be fine in my house, don't worry about me.' She said quickly and sharply, the idea of Lucas, Peyton and her living together was way too much for her.

Peyton was taken aback by the tone of Brooke's voice, because it came out a little sharp. She didn't know what else could she say, so she just nodded her head. For the first time, she didn't know what could she say to her best friend.

'Brooke, do you want me to get you something?'

'No, Peyt, I'm okay. Thanks.'

The two best friends stayed in silent for the next couple of minutes, neither one of them knowing what to say.

'Brooke, I'm gonna go, I'm sure there're more people who'd wanna see you now, we were all really worried.'

'Peyton, there's nothing to worry about, okay?'

'Don't say that, Brooke! Damn it, Brooke, you tried to kill yourself. For God's sake, it's not nothing. It's something to worry about, it's a big deal for everyone. Stop running away from the size of the things you do. Do you know how scared I was? And everyone else? Damn it, Brooke, that was so selfish of you!' Peyton couldn't hold it together anymore, so she said everything she had bottled on the inside. Brooke sighted.

'Peyton, don't come in here calling me selfish. Just don't, okay? And get out now, I don't wanna talk to you anymore.' Her voice was sharp but not loud. But, Peyton got the message right, it was time for her to leave and say nothing more.

In the next few hours, Brooke spent most of her time talking to her doctors and doing some exams so they would check if there's any sign of the pills she took left and how big is the damage they made. Nathan and Haley needed to go back home and watch over Jamie, while Peyton and Lucas went home a bit later because the doctor told them there's nothing they can do if they stay at the hospital. As they were getting ready to go to sleep Peyton spoke 'Hey, do you think Brooke somehow blaims me for this?'

'Where's this coming from, Peyton?'

'It's just that... I was in her room today and she just.. she talked to me as if I was a stranger, like she didn't want me there. She told me to get out.'

Lucas laughed. 'What did you expect? Everyone's sprinkling questions and words of support on her, and she just feels under pressure. I'm sure she would've said the same thing to every single one of us if we went. In fact, Nate told me she wasn't really nice to him either.' Lucas tried to comfort her and he put his arms around her from behind. 'Don't worry, everything will sort out. I'll go talk to her in the morning.' He said in order to calm Peyton down, but he knew he really wanted and needed to go see Brooke, hoping he will be the one she will open up to.

In the morning Lucas had a quick breakfast and went straight to the hospital, to visit Brooke and try to get her to open up to him. As he was walking down the hallways he remembered that one time he was in this hospital, half-dead, after he had a heart attack. At one moment, a memory of him half-concious and yet unable to move or talk or open his eyes and of Brooke standing next to his bed crossed his mind. Up to this day he isn't sure if that was a dream or she was really there talking to him, telling him he needs to take care of Peyton for her. He then remembers seeing Keith in his dream and remembers wishing to have another heart attack so he could see his uncle again. He shakes off this memories and tries to focus on today and Brooke as he walks up to her door. He takes a deep breath and knocks. 'Come in!' he hears her raspy voice as he opens the door.

'Hey, pretty girl.' He says loosely, not even thinking about the words that just escaped his lips. She looks at him, taken aback by what he said, and taken back to the time when she was the happiest girl in the world, she freezes for a few seconds, but then realizes the words he just said don't hold a meaning in them and that if she asked him right now he wouldn't know what he just said, she decides to let go of it and focus on the conversation.

'Hey, what's up?' she answers casualy as if they were sitting in her living room and chatting.

Lucas chuckles cause he realizes she's trying to act like everything's fine and normal, but he decides to play along. 'Not much, just got up, had a good breakfast and decided I wanted to see you.'

'Did your wifey make you your favorite meal?' The sentence comes out different than she wanted it to. Her tone is slightly bitter, and Lucas senses something weird about it, but he lets go.

'No, I made it myself, Peyt's still asleep.' He searches his brain for the next words to say, something that can trigger the real conversation he came here for and the only thing that comes out is 'How are you?'

Brooke smiles. 'You know, besides the doctors, you're the first person to ask me that. I'm okay, much better now. Everything's fine with my brain, no damage made there.'

'And how's your heart?' he asks carefully, hoping it's not too soon or too direct or tha she won't say it simply is none of his business.

'Fragile.' She answers simply and her face turns sad. He doesn't see bitterness or harshness in her eyes, she just sees her vulnerability.

'Everything is fixable.' He tries to answer, to find the words she needs to hear.

'I'm not sure about it, Luke. Some things are not in your power to change them and you can't run away from them no matter how hard you try and no matter how far away you run.' She answers and looks him dead in the eye. He's not sure what she's talking about so he gives her a puzzled look.

'Never mind, Lucas. Either way, I'm going away as soon as I get out of here.' She looks down, she doesn't want to see his eyes when he recieves this news cause she knows she could find truth in them, truth about how he feels about her leaving, and she's not sure if she could handle seeing he doesn't even care.

As soon as she says those words fear overcomes him. Fear of losing her completely. 'Where are you going?' he asks 'And how long are you staying?'

'I'm going back to New York and I'll be there for a month or so.' She answers and he feels relief, at least for a little while. 'And then I'm going to Paris for a few weeks and then to Milan, probably forever.' She says those last words loosely, to convince him that's what she really wants. She looks through the window, not able to stand his gaze.

'What? You're moving all the way to Europe?' he's confused, and he stares at her dumbfolded, not sure what more could he say. Should he ask and beg her to stay? Should he say goodbye?

She nodds her head still not moving her eyes from the window. 'It's not certain yet, but that's the plan.'

'Since when?'

'Since earlier this morning, you're the first to know. Tree Hill's so beautiful in the summer.' She concludes as she looks at the ocean through the window.

'Brooke, don't leave again.' His words are simple, yet true.

'There's nothing keeping me here.' She answers even simplier, and finally dares to turn around and look at him

'What about Nate and Haley? And Peyton? What about Jamie? Your store? What about me?'

'You guys all have each other and I'll try my best to come back for Jamie's birthday, after all I am his godmother. The store is completely ruined, broken and everything's been stolen from there, including my new sketches, as you've probably already heard. You said I save people, Luke, and now is the time for me to save myself.'

'No, Brooke, it's time for me to save you, just like I promised all those years ago. I've been kicking myself for days for not keeping that promise.' He says and she gets teary eyed. She's not sure why, but just the fact he remembers that still makes her heart ache for the time that's long gone.

'Luke, don't. I didn't save you either, so there's no promise to be kept.'

'You did save me, Brooke. Many times, even if you might not know it.'

She gives him a puzzled look, not sure what he's talking about. In a way, she wants him to finish his sentence, to tell her what he meant by it, but a part of her is scared it will only cause her more pain.

'You saved me from going crazy right after Keith died. You saved me that night in New York, after Peyton and I broke up. And you saved me again only months ago, when Lindsay left me.'

'But, Luke, I did nothing.'

'You were there, Brooke, making sure I eat, sleep and laugh. Making sure I find a reason to stay alive, and I always did. Sometimes, that's more than enough.' He says and looks deeply into her eyes. She starts crying, overwhelmed by emotions that stirred up inside her. For the first time she really sees the immensity of what she tried to do to herself, and all the people she would've hurt in the process. Luke wraps his arms around her and she holds onto his grasp strongly. He plaes on head on the back of her head and slightly strokes her hair. He's on the verge of tears too, realizing now what amazing friend he would've lost if she died, and knowing he did nothing to stop her from trying what she did.

'I'm so sorry.' He whispers into her ear. 'I'm here now. That may not be much, but it's all I can offer. We are all here.' He says and she starts crying even more. 'Just let it all out, Brooke. You'll feel better afterwards.' He says and kisses her hair, making sure she knows he's there for her.

**That's it people. I'll try my best to UD again in a few days! PLEASE REVIEW, each review means the world to me. What did you like or dislike about this chapter. I want to send another BIG FAT THANK YOU to everyone who reviewed the previous chapter. Julian will probably appear in the fic in the next few chapters. I can't tell you how it's gonna end couples-vise cause that would kill the fun, right? Plus, I'm not even sure about it myself. So stick to the story and you will find out. Again, PLEASE REVIEW. Thank you!!! Also, I would like to ask you all the check out another fic I have pending, it's called SOMETIMES PAIN AND HEARTACHE BRING LOVE AND JOY. I kinda abandoned that one, but if you guys are interested in it, I will continue writing it. So, check it out and let me know how you feel about it! Hope you're all having an amazing summer holiday!**


	6. Let It Roll

**Here's the next chapter – FINALLY. Thanks to the people who reviewed the previous one, and I really hope you'll like this one. The next one will be up as soon as I get some time to work on it, it should be soon cause I already have an idea of what I wanna do with it. PLEASE READ AND REVIEW, keeps me going and makes me happy... **

'Just please... rethink the idea you mentioned before. Don't make that kind of decisions so fast and without thinking them through enough. Europe's not the answer.' Luke said before he left her room. She nodded, knowing he's most probably right. He left because Dr. Stevens came by to check on Brooke and take her to her first meating with the psychiatrist.

'You're getting much better, Brooke. Luckily, pills and alcohol left no consequences on your brain or any of your vital functions. I think I will be able to let you leave the hospital in two or maybe three days, after you're done with the consultations.'

'Can't I leave earlier and come back for the consults?'

'How about this idea: You do 2hours today, instead of just one, and after it I'll talk to our psychiatrist and if she thinks you can leave, I'll let you, but you will have to come back for 2 more hours tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. Okay?'

Brooke smiled. 'Of course. Thank you.'

Doctor Stevens smiled back 'No problem, Brooke. Let's go.'

Fifteen minutes later Brooke found herself at the psychiatrists office.

'Hello, Brooke. I'm Dr. Roberts.' The woman said as Brooke was entering the office.

'Nice to meet you, Dr. Roberts. Brooke Davis.' Brooke said as she shoke hands with the woman. Dr Roberts showed her the couch she should sit on, and Brooke did as she was told.

'So, Brooke, I talked to your doctor and he told me what happened. What no one knows is why it happened. I'm here not to judge you but to talk to you and try to help. Feel free to say whatever's on your mind, I'm here to listen.'

Brooke nodded and smiled, but hesitated her words for a few seconds. She wasn't sure how could she open up to a stranger, she didn't know what to say and what should she say, really.

'I was attacked a few weeks ago in my store.' Brooke started with a thrembling voice.

'Okay. Do you know who did it?'

'I know my mom ordered it. But, no, I don't know who was the attacker. I was beaten up badly and I also had my new sketches stolen. Without it, I can't do anything.'

'Why would your mother do that to you?' the doctor tried to get Brooke to talk more, to open up a bit more, to say something more about how she felt, instead of just saying what happened.

'Because... she loves money and power more than anything else. More than herself I think. Anyhow, she just wanted to take my company away from me, and she did it. She got what she wanted.'

'And what did you lose, Brooke?'

Brooke gave her a puzzled look, she wasn't sure what she was getting at. 'I lost my company.' She replied slowly, as if she wasn't sure the doctor would understand the words.

'I understand that, Brooke. But, what did you _lose?' _

'The only thing I made for myself, the only thing I ever wanted and really got, the one thing that makes me feel like I'm worth existing even. You see, all my life I've been losing everything: my house, my parents, though it always felt as if I never had them, friends, I even lost my virginity to someone whose name I don't remember, I lost the one guy I ever loved, I lost Angie and now I lost my company. I guess I'm just trying to say I'm sick of losing everything that ever meant something to me.' She tried to explain and tears were forming in her eyes. 'So I guess I've had enough of losing things and people so I just... I wanted the pain to go away.' She finished

'Pain is a part of life, Brooke. So is losing. Have you ever wondered who's to blame for all of that?'

'My parents partly, cause they never raised me, really. But most of all myself.' She finished the sentence and sighted. 'I just realized that all my life I've been running away, never really fighting to keep what I have. I'm doing it now as well, instead of making new sketches, working long hours, delaying the meetings as much as I can and fighting back to Victoria I just gave up. I gave her what she wanted with no struggle. I don't know if it's cause I stopped caring about the company or because I'm simply afraid of putting all my energy and love and care into something that I will either way lose to her in the end.'

'Why are you so sure you would lose it either way?'

'Because she's better than me at this. Because she has what it takes to run that company. Because... some things just happen either way, they're destined to happen.' Brooke zoomed out for a few seconds, thinking aboout her life, the past relationships with people and her parents, their marriage that screwed her over and made her like this.

An hour later Dr. Roberts was listening to Brooke still talking about her company and how big of a loss that is for her, and about her mother who destroyed everything for Brooke, even the possibility to adopt. The doctor felt as if Brooke wasn't telling her everything, yet, she was pleased with how their first meeting was going.

'Brooke, I want to ask you something here. You don't have to answer it if you don't want to. But, it's really important for you to think about it, even if you don't share the thoughts with me .' Brooke nodded and dr. Roberts continued 'All of this you mentioned today is a lot for someone at your age, but it still puzzles me what pushed the limit for you. What was it that made you try to take away your own life?'

Brooke thought about it for a few seconds. She didn't know what exactly should she say to the doctor, she never felt there was one thing that pushed her to that limit, but just the fact that everything pilled up for her. 'I don't know. Like I said, I just wanted the pain to go away. It became too much for me to handle it, and I felt so, so lonely. I think I've been very lonely for the last few years, but this company was what kept me going, it was the last thing I could hold onto, and then I lost it as well. It became too much for me to go through and survive. I think that was the final straw for me, that attack. It opened up my eyes.'

'In what sense, Brooke?'

'None of my friends cared. Most of them didn't even ask me what happened. I said I fell down the stairs and that was enough of an explanation for them. I think they just didn't even care. I went through it alone. Plus...' Brooke stopped, not sure if she should say what was on her mind. The doctor gave her an ushering look, but Brooke stayed silent for a few more seconds. 'Plus, the night I was robbed... that guy trashed my store, took my sketches, he beat me up, kicked me and smacked me and then when I was powerless and barely moving he... he... he raped me.' She barely finishes the sentence and tears are running down her face now. This was the first time she said it out loud, the first time she spoke about what else happened that night. Doctor Roberts decided to wait a few seconds, to let her get it out and then continue the talk 'Brooke, have you told this to anyone?'

'Just you.' She answers shortly as she wipes her tears away.

'Right now, you need all the support you can get. Talk to your friends, tell them what happened, you need someone who can take care of you and be there for you.'

'I can take care of myself.'

'See, Brooke, none of us care. We convince ourselves that we need no one and that we're strong and independent and that nobody can help us out, that we have to fight our own battles all alone. But, it's never like that, Brooke. Sometimes, we need a little help on the way, we need love and support and we need someone who can fight our battles not for us, but with us, and that little thing is what helps us solve the problems instead of giving up.'

Brooke nodded. Deep down she knew the doctor was right, but she didn't know who can she turn to and say what she has to say. On top of it, she never really knew how to ask for help.

'Thank you.' She said simply.

'That's what I'm here for, Brooke. Anyways, I think this is enough for today, maybe it was even too much for you. I'll tell your doctor he can let you go back home. I'll give you my phone number so we can arrange the next meeting. We have two more obligatory hours to do, but we'll separate them in two days, okay?'

'Sure thing. I'll call you tomorrow. Thanks again.' Brooke said as she got up from the couch. She approached the doctor again, to take her number and to shake her hand again. She left the hospital merely 2 hours later. Nathan came to pick her up.

'So, Brooke, Haley and I want you to stay with us for the next few days, until you feel completely better. How about that?' Nate spoke as he carried her small suitcase down the stairs of the hospital to the car.

'Nate, thanks so much for the offer, but honestly, I can manage on my own.'

'Brooke, let us be there for you. Plus, you'll get to spend time with Jamie and even Haley and me a lot more. We barely see each other anymore. Come on, at least for a while. You have my permission to leave whenever you feel like it.' They both laughed at the last sentence. Brooke remembered the words of Dr. Roberts, about turning to her friends, so she decided that moving in with Naley may be a good idea for her. 'Oh, fine, Nate, you convinced me. But only because I get so spend more time with the blond and most handsome Scott.'

'Brooke, I'm not sure if you're aware of it, but Lucas doesn't live with us.' Nate replied jokingly. Brooke gave him a look and laughed 'I was talking about Jamie, hot shot.'

'Been a while since you called me that.' Nate replied and put his free arm around Brooke's shoulder. She looked at his arm and smiled. It felt good to have someone there to take care of you. Made her feel safe.

After a twenty minute drive they pulled up in front of the house. They walked to the door and Nate said how surprised and happy the rest of the family will be when they see he got Brooke to live with them. They entered the house.

'Babe, I'm home.' Nate slightly yelled to get Haley's attention.

'How's Brooke doing?' Haley asked as she was almost running down the stairs.

'Fine. In the mood for a cocktail... non-alcoholic.' Brooke answered and smiled when Haley finally came downstairs. A huge smile appeared across Haley's face when she saw Brooke. She ran into her arms and hugged her.

'Can't believe he actually managed to convince you.'

'You're doubting my persuading skills?' Nate joked

'Well, that's true Hales, he did get you to marry him.' Brooke joked along as she and Haley broke off their hug.

'Actually, she forced me to the altar.' Nate said and less than a second later Haley hit him on the chest playfully. 'Very funny, Nathan. Anyway...' she said as she turned her attention to Brooke 'You must be hungry, you've been eating hospital food for two days. So how about you and Nate go get your stuff from the house here, and in the meantime I'll make lunch. Sounds good?'

'It's a plan, Hales. I just... I wanna thank you both for what you're doing for me, now and... ever really. You are amazing friends.' Brooke spoke softly and Haley gave her another short hug.

'I love you, Tigger.'

'If you two don't plan to get it on and do more than hugging, I think we should get on with the plan.' Nate said with a laugh, and both girls gave him a look.

'Come on, Nate, let's go before she divorces you.' Brooke joked and all three of them burst into laughing. Brooke put her arm around Nate and the two of them walked out and went over to get her stuff. At the house, Brooke took the clothes she needed, make up, shoes, and all the other neccessities while Nate was sitting in the living room waiting for her to finish packing since she told him to let her do it alone and just enjoy 'a basketball game or something on TV' as she said.

'Brooke, your cell's ringing.' He yelled when he heard the ringtone coming from her purse. Brooke walked out of her room and searched her purse for her phone. When she found it she answered

'Hello?'

'_Hey. Just wanted to ask ya how did the meeting go?'_

'It was great, they let me out already, I'm at home picking some things up.

'_Why didn't you call me to come and pick you up?'_

'It's okay, Nate came. Don't worry. But, thanks for offering.'

'_Anytime, Brooke. Well, I don't wanna hold you up anymore, but call me whenever you feel like talking, okay? By the way, does this mean you decided against moving away?'_

'Yeah, at least for the time being. And, I will call you, don't worry. Actually, I was wondering if you wanna go out with me tonight? Dinner's on me.'

'_Well, if you're paying, than why not? Pick you up at 7, okay?'_

'Sure. Just pick me up at Nathan and Haley's, I'm staying with them.'

'_You picked them over us, huh?' _They both laugh

'They have a blond cutie, sorry.' She answers jokingly

'_I'm a blond cutie, too, you know.'_

'Hahaha, Jamie's cuter. See you tonight, Luke.' She finished the conversation and puts her phone on the sofa.

'That was Lucas?' Nate asks

'Yeah. He's worrying, as always.'

'That's who he is. You know, he barely left your bed side at the hospital.'

'Really?'

'Yeah, he didn't want you to be alone when you wake up. So, you guys are going out tonight?'

'Mhm. We haven't talked since before he went to Vegas with Peyton. It's catch up time.' She said and smiled. Nate smiled back. 'So you done packing?' he asked

'Think so. Even if I did forget something, I'll come back for it, it's not like the house's not mine anymore.'

'Yeah, let's roll.' He said as she stood up and went to the room to get her bags before they left the house and went back to Naley's.

'Aunt Brooke!!!' Jamie screamed as they came in

'Hey, handsome. Come here!' she screamed back and squatted down to hug Jamie.

'I missed you.' He said as he wrapped his arms around her firmly. 'Mommy says you'll be living with us now.'

'I missed you too, kiddo. And yeah, I'll live with you guys for a while. You don't mind, do you?'

'Mind? I LOVE it! We can eat ice cream all the time now and watch TV all day long.' Jamie spoke and Brooke looked at Haley.

'Sorry, Hales, couldn't resist his cute smile. How do you say no to him, anyways?' Brooke said as she got up and everyone smiled.

'It's hard, I know.' Nate adds and Haley just laughes.

'I know you give him ice cream more than I tell you to, you're bigger kid than he is. And I know you let him play longer if he plays basketball.' She says as she turns to Nate. Brooke and Nathan look at each other and start laughing.

'But someone's gotta be firm here.' Haley adds and starts laughing along with them.

'Come on, lunch's ready.' She adds and all four of them walk to the kitchen, with Jamie holding Brooke's hand.

'I'll take your suitcases up after lunch, okay?' Nate asks Brooke

'Sure.' She answers. She looks at the three of them and realizes they're one amazing little family and amazing people. In five minutes they made her feel at home and loved, and right now, it was the only thing she really needed.

**DONE. I know I'm not too fast, but hey, I'm getting better at it, it's been less than 2 months this time. I'll try to UD more frequently from now on, promise. Please REVIEW and let me know what you liked or disliked about this chapter. Sorry there's no Peyton in it, I just didn't really find a place for her here, but she will be in the story more in the near future. If you have any ideas, let me know, I love hearing everything you guys got to say! So REVIEW, it means the world to me!**


	7. You Found Me

**Here I come with another chapter for you, guys. Thanks so much for the reviews for the previous chapter, means a lot to me. Hopefully, you'll like this one as well. Without firther addo, I'll leave you with the story...**

After a delicious lunch Haley prepared, Nate and Jamie went outside to play some basketball by the pool, while Brooke and Haley made some non-alcoholic cocktails and found their way outside as well, sitting by the pool.

'Hales, I thanked Nate, but I want to thank you too for what you're doing for me.' Brooke started, a bit insecure. A smile played on her lips 'I don't think I could survive this on my own in that huge house. Here I have company... more so, I feel like I have a family.'

Haley got slightly teary eyed listening to Brooke, wondering what she must've been going through before the suicide attempt. 'Brooke, don't mention it. I... _we _love you. So you should just stop thanking us for anything. After all, don't you remember you were the one who gave us a place to live many years ago? You moved out of the house so me and Nate could have it for ourselves again. This is the least we could do, Brooke, just for having you in our lives.'

Brooke wrapped her arms around Haley strongly. 'I love you Hales' she said barely over a whisper. Haley rubbed her back. Both girls were hoping this was a new beginning, a new chance knowing fully it's most of all a new challange for all of them.

'Brooke, listen, I don't want to pressure you and make you talk about anything, but you should know that I'm here to listen to you whenever you feel like talking. Don't shut me out, okay?'

Brooke nodded simply, knowing Haley was honest and she really meant what she just said, but Brooke wasn't ready to talk, not yet anyways.

------

'Hey, babe, I'm going out with Brooke later.' Lucas started simply while opening the fridge to get some water while Peyton was sitting in the kitchen, doing something on her laptop.

Peyton drifted her attention from the laptop to Lucas 'She's out of the hospital?' she asked, her face showing the surprise at what Lucas just said.

'Yeah, today. Nate picked her up and she's gonna move in with them, stay there for a few days. You didn't know?'

'No...I didn't. How did you find out?'

'I called her to see how she's doing and she told me she was out and with Nate.'

'Oh, okay.' Peyton was still in shock over the fact her best friend didn't even call to tell her she was out of the hospital but also the fact she chose to live with Nate and Haley instead of her and Luke.

'I'm sure she didn't call anyone to let them know.' As if he was reading her mind, Lucas said the sentence that put Peyton's mind to rest.

'Anyway, you wanna tag along?' Luke asked before taking a sip of water from the bottle.

'Actually, I have some things to finish tonight. I'll give you two some time to talk but I'll call Brooke and ask her if she wants to have lunch tomorrow with me.'

'Sounds good. What do you have to do tonight?'

'Just finish some things for the label, nothing important.'

Lucas gives her a peck on the lips 'I'm gonna go shower' he says and leaves the room.

Peyton turns her attention back to the laptop and IMs 'See you at 8' to someone before signing out and closing her laptop.

----

After hearing a door bell Brooke gets up from the living room at Naley's. 'It's probably Luke. I'll see you guys tomorrow.' She says as she gives Jamie a kiss and waves to Nate and Haley.

'Hey, Brooke!' Nate says as he puts his hand into his pocket 'Here's the key, so you can enter the house tonight without molesting anyone of us. Just leave it in the living room, I think I'm gonna go out real early.' He adds. Brooke kinks her eyebrow 'Don't worry, I won't interrupt. See ya.' She winks and leaves them. She opens the door and Luke pulls her in for a hug.

'Good to see ya feeling better.' He says before breaking the hug.

'Good to see you too, Luke.' She replies as they start walking out of the yard.

'Hey, I figured we could jump the whole dinner thing, and just go for a walk, maybe get some beer and sit on the Rivercourt. No one goes there anymore, I'm sure it's empty.' He suggests and searches her eyes to see if she likes the idea. If he was honest with himself, he figured that would be an easier way of talking really, instead of going out for dinner. Brooke smiles 'Sure, I'd love that.' She replies simply and he wraps her arm around her shoulders. 'Is this gonna make me famous? Throwing an arm around the famous Brooke Davis?' he jokes, and she laughs at his silly face that reminds her of his old self. 'Well, more popular than any of your books, really.' She plays along. He puts his free hand on his heart and makes a hurtful face 'That was painful.' He adds and they both laugh.

----

As she's in the elevator, Peyton wonders if this visit was a smart thing to do. She knows it's probably a bad idea, but her curiosity didn't allow her to say 'no'. She walks to the doors of one room and after taking a deep breath she knocks. Only seconds later the door opens and Julian motions her to come in.

'It's been a while.' He says as he shows her an armchair where she can take a seat.

'Yeah, I know. But, cut the crap with me, Julian, and just go straight to the point. What are you doing here?'

'Relax, Peyton. Do you want something to drink?'

'Not before you tell me what you're doing here.' She answers, still sounding very unpleasent.

'I wanna talk to you about something. Don't worry, I'm not here to hit on you.' He answers honestly and she knows it. She sees it in his eyes. She finally takes a seat in the armchair he motioned her to before. 'Whiskey.' She says and he smiles. 'Some things never change.'

He pours two glasses of whiskey and puts them on the coffee table before taking a seat on the armchair next to Peyton.

'Cheers.' He says as he raises his glass and she takes her as well. 'Cheers.' She replies and smiles as their glasses hit each other lightly. He smiles back.

----

The four beers are placed on the table right next to the Rivercourt and Brooke and Lucas are sitting on the bench next to it, laughing at something random and stupid he just remembered from their high school days.

'God, it feels like a completely different life.' She says before taking a sip of her beer.

'I know. Everytime I come here I just can't believe how long it's been since high school finished.'

'Yeah.' She says and there's a a silence between them, as they're both lost in their own thoughts. She thinks back to the carefree days of high school, and he thinks about ways to ask her about everything that made her do what she did just days ago. She breaks the silence.

'So, have you and Peyton set a date yet?'

'No, not really. We haven't really discussed it yet, not that it matters anymore. We're living together, we can get married on any sunny day of the year.' He answers and smiles. She smiles back.

'Where's the romantic Lucas Scott we all know?'

He chuckles at this. He's been wondering the same thing for a while now, ever since the lame proposal he threw Peyton's way, over the phone, inviting her to get married in Vegas. He always thought his proposal would be more romantic, special, at some place meaningful. 'I guess he grew up and realized life's not rainbows and butterflies. It's just about doing the right thing, whatever way its done. You gotta use every second you have with the people you love.'

She knows this words. She's heard them before, a long time ago. It was at the time she and Lucas were friends again, after the first break up, and those are the words Peyton used to encourage her to call Lucas, go out with him, try again. She believed her words, not just those but also the next ones she said _'for_ _once I wouldn't make out with him this time._'

----

'So, Julian, will you finally tell me why are you here?'

'I read Lucas's book. And... now I realize why you left me for him. I loved it, every part of it.' He answers and she's taken aback by what she hears. She expected him to say anything but this. He hated that book more than anything, after all that's the book that broke them up a year or so ago, the book he couldn't handle seeing anymore, seeing her buy it every time she sees it, seeing her read it over and over again. So one day he got sick of it and told her he can't do it anymore, can't fight the spirit of Lucas Scott that's hanging over their relationship. For a few days, she suffered the loss of Julian, after all, she was in love with him, but then she realized he was right and that's when she decieded to go back to Tree Hill, find Lucas and the happiness she let go of years ago.

'And you came to tell me this?' she asked, still confused.

Julian chuckles. 'No... I mean, not really. After reading the book I realized it would make an amazing movie. So, I wanted to find Lucas and see if he wants to do that. But, before talking to him, I wanted to talk to you, see if you're okay with it. I called your work and they told me you quit your job so I figured you came back here. I got here two days ago and on the same day I arrived I went out to walk around the town, catch a glimpse of the world I read about and I saw you with Lucas near the Tre Hill Hospital. Figured right away you guys are back together. So, basicaly, I'm here to talk to you about this idea and to ask for your permission to talk to Lucas about it.' He finishes and takes a sip of his whiskey.

Peyton thinks through what he just told her, trying to find the best answer. This was not what she expected to hear from Julian, ever. She wondered about the idea he had, and she knew it was good, 'Ravens' was an amazing book that could easily make a really great movie. The confusion came when she realized Lucas, her fiancee, and Julian, her ex boyfriend, would have to work together.

'So?' he asks after seconds of complete silence.

'I don't know, Julian.'

'Listen, if it makes any difference, we don't have to tell Lucas about us, he doesn't have to know. It doesn't even matter anymore. But, that book deserves this.'

She debates a few more seconds. 'Okay. Talk to Lucas about this, make the offer. Just... under one condition: he can never find out you are my ex boyfriend, at least not from you. If ever I decide it's time to let him know – I will tell him, but you keep your mouth shut.' She replies and he nodds.

'I promise. One more thing, Peyton-' he starts and she looks at him, ushering him to speak on. 'When Lucas mentions this to you... be supportive. I need you on my side.'

'Sure thing. But, I'm not doing it for you, I'm doing it for Luke.' She says and drinks down the rest of her whiskey.

'This is a good reason to celebrate.' He says and stends up to get more whiskey for them. She wonders if it's possible to be friends with this guy after how they went down. She shrugs it off, allowing herself to go with the flow, for once in her life, after all one thing she was sure of – Julian was not a bad guy and if he's not here to get her back... they just might work the friendship part out just fine.

----

'Are you happy, Luke?' she asks a simple question, unsure herself why she asked it. He gives her a puzzled look, not really sure what to say 'I guess I am. I mean, if you're asking about the fact I'm back with Peyton, yeah, she makes me happy. But, at the same time, I'm just really worried about you.' He answers back truthfully and she appreciates it. 'We need more beer.' She concludes, seeing 8 empty bottles laying around them. 'I'll go get more, the store's near by.' He replies while standing up and leaving. It's been almost 2 hours of them hanging out and not once he asked her about how she is doing and what happened, and she really appreciated the fact he didn't put any pressure on her. While they were reminescing things from their high school past and talking a bit about things that happened during the four years of almost non seeing each other at all the only thing she really focused on were the lyrics written all over the rivercourt. She knew those lyrics because Peyton made her listen to the song over and over again ages ago claiming it's the most perfect love song there is. She wasn't sure why she dedicated so much attention to the paint on the rivercourt, but in a way it was just one more thing that reminded her of what she doesn't have in her life – love. Only minutes later Lucas came back and found her staring at The Cure lyrics.

'Penny for your thoughts' he said simply while putting down four more beers. She took one out right away and opened it. After taking a sip she answered 'I was just thinking how your and Peyton's love is now all over our old signatures, kinda represents what we all knew – that love would last longer and shine brighter than the group.'

'Don't say that, Brooke. We are all back together, back to being friends. And I'll tell you a secret: I don't even like The Cure.'

They both laugh. 'Actually, I like one of their songs, I think it's called Friday I'm In Love.' She answers and he nodds. 'Yeah, that one's... bareable.' He answers and they laugh again.

'Hey, wanna go walk down the beach?' she asks him and he raises his head to look her in the eyes. 'Sure.' He answers simply and they both stand up, picking up beer and her purse from the table before walking away from the Rivercourt.

----

'Remember that boring dinner you made me go to?' she says and starts laughing right away and he joins her laughing.

'Imagine what would it be like for me if you didn't come along.' He answers and they continue laughing.

'We got so drunk that I don't even remember the night completely. It's all one big blur.'

'I actually remember the end of the night pretty clearly, it's when we first talked about moving in together.' He answers and they both switch to silent for a few seconds.

'I'm sorry.' She says as she breaks the silence and he looks up at her and nodds. He knows she's apologizing for the way their relationship ended, for the fact she didn't let go of the image of Lucas through all their relationship and for placing the blame for the break up on him. She knows he understands and that she needs no more words and explaining.

'So, how are things with your family now?'

'Usual. As always. Mom's in New York and dad's in LA, giving me a hard time, claiming I'm useless. I really hope that with this movie I'll prove him wrong for once.'

'Don't do that!' she almost yells and hits him playfully on the shoulder. 'Now I feel like I have to make Luke agree on doing this movie with you.'

'That was the plan.' He says and laughs, and she knows he's partly joking about it, but also knows he really does need this movie to show his father what he's capable of.

'So... you and Luke... how's that going?' he asks and she looks away from him, somehow she didn't feel completely good talking to Julian about Lucas so she gives a rather short answer. 'It's going great, we're engaged.'

'I'm happy for you, Peyt.' He says and he means it. A part of him is sad that the two of them never worked out but he knows Luke's the one who makes her happy and that's all that really matters to him.

----

'The ocean's beautiful at night.' She says in a voice thats barely over a whisper, afraid she might break the perfect silence that surround them.

'It is. Wanna take a seat somewhere?' he says and she says 'yes' silently and takes a seat right there where they were standing. They both look at the ocean, silent for minutes.

'I was raped.' She starts all of a sudden, and he's taken aback by her words. He says 'what?' for many reasons: he's not sure he heard her right and if he did then that was the only word he could really let out in the state of shock he was in.

'You heard me.' She replies, still not moving her eyes from the ocean. Lucas looks at her, unable to say anything for a few seconds. 'When? Where? Who did it?' he finally lets out all the questions that are wandering through his mind.

'When the store was robbed, the guy didn't just beat me up.' She answers and again, when talking about this, tears are forming in her eyes and she does nothing to stop them from falling. He feels helpless, like there's nothing he can do to make it better for her and it brings him down, the fact that he can't change what happened. So he does the only thing that felt logical to him, pulls her head to his chest and almost starts crying himself.

'Ssshhh, it'll be okay.' He repeats a few times, trying to convince both her and himself it really will.

'I know, I just need time to heal. I'll be alright just not tonight.' She says and pulls him closer to her, feeling safe in his arms.

'Do you have any idea who it might've been?'

'I am 100 percent sure it was Victoria who ordered it. Maybe not the raping, but the robbery... for sure. I have no clue who did her dirty business.' She replies and still tries to figure out why would her mom do something like that to her. Something this cruel... almost monstruous.'

'Quite the parents we got.' Luke replies as he strokes her hair, remembering the day he lost Keith.

'I still can't believe she fell that low just to get the company. How could she do this to me, Luke?'

'I wish I could have an answer for you, Brooke. I really do. But, I can't understand how can a parent wish something bad upon their own child, let alone do something to hurt them. Their love's supposed to be unconditional, but some of them just don't know what those words mean... just stay away from her, Brooke. She doesn't deserve a daughter like you.' He says to comfort her, and it works because mere seconds later she stops sobbing, still staying in his arms.

'I'm here. Always. Don't ever forget that, Brooke.' He says and he kisses her forehead. The night was gonna be long, he knew that. He also knew the few things he has to do tomorrow, people he needs to talk to.

**DONE! Hope I didn't keep you waiting for this chapter too long. Anyway, there goes JULIAN. Slightly different than in the show, but I didn't wanna change his role completely. What did you think of this chapter? Liked it? Loved it? Hated it? REVIEW and let me know. All ideas you have are very much appreciated, every review means the world to me.**

**ALSO: SOMETIMES PAIN AND HEARTACHE BRING LOVE AND JOY – my long forgotten fic I tried to bring back to life. Post s4 BL fic. Check it out, you won't be disappointed.**


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